The adventure started in London....

So, I had a layover in London. I was supposed to land at 6:05 AM, giving me plenty of time to catch my 8:10 flight. The pilot had to circle around for awhile, so we didn't get down until 6:25. Still plenty of time....

I get off the plane and took a bus 15 feet to terminal 3. My next flight is in terminal 2, so I follow the signs up stairs, through a long hallway, down stairs, through another long hallway to the bus that takes you to terminal 1 and 2. After about 18 turns on the bus, we're at the terminal, it's now 6:50. More stairs and hallways that take me in what feels like more circles. I get in the security line. "Only one carry on allowed in the UK" the security person says. "What if I have 2?". "You have to go the other way". "huh?". He points towards customs.... Another person explains I have to go through UK customs, check my bag at the ticket counter, then go back through security... Yeah, that's efficient. I take 2 minutes to debate whether i can take the 3 pairs of shoes in my backpack, put them in various coat pockets, then stuff the laptop bag in the backpack. It won't work. There's about 200 people in line for customs. I'll never make it. A Columbian girl, having the same problem, says she's going in the short line that has 2 people in it and no sign that says what it's for. They don't let her through because she's not from the EU. Hmm... has the US joined the EU, yet? I'll try.... I explain my situation using my official passport (it is now officially worth the extra money I ended up paying). A special agent takes me aside to question me, then lets me go. The Columbian girl is still stuck. It's now 7:10. I sprint through baggage claim, up to the ticket counters, down the entire front and up the back (think dulles). No Lufthansa... I ask someone. He points outside, to the left, 10 minute walk. I run it. A taxi driver gives me more directions (I'm glad UK is english speaking). 7:15. Short line at the ticket counter, 20 person line at security, then about 5 in line for passport check. I'm in the wrong line. It's not moving. 7:40. I switch lines, get through, run to the gate. I get there at 7:47, they started boarding at 7:45. Awesome...

I wore too many layers.... Worst designed airport ever.